Alex Carrick’s Blog

Driven to Write — Enjoy the Ride — Share the Journey

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Entries Tagged as 'Outrageous'

How to Know When You’re the Opposite of Handy

February 22nd, 2014 · 1 Comment · American Humor, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Charming, Children and Pets, Clash of the Sexes, Construction Humor, Cute, Family Humor, Farce, Funny Banter, Funny Construction, Funny Do It Yourself, Funny Dog, Funny Embarrassment, Funny Family, Funny Generation Gap, Funny Handyman, Funny Hobby, Funny Husband & Wife Story, Funny Pain, Funny Technology, Human Nature, Lifestyle, Offbeat, Outrageous, Romp, Satire, Screwball, Slice of Life

“Real” men know how to make and repair things. They’re even able to improvise. I’m always astonished when one of my friends assembles furniture out of ferns. I’m not feeling as bad about my shortcomings as I used to. Nowadays, most things are so complex that when they break down, the only recourse is to […]

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How to Know When You’ve Become a Certain Kind of Writer (wink wink)

February 8th, 2014 · 1 Comment · American Humor, Amusing, Bad Taste, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Charming, Clash of the Sexes, Cop Humor, Cute, Farce, Funny Embarrassment, Funny Erotica, Funny R-rated, Funny Sex, Funny Writing Story, Jokes, Lifestyle, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Puns, Romp, Screwball, Sexual Innuendo, Twisted, Whimsy, Witty, Zany

Surrounded by racy stories in the media everywhere these days, I sometimes find myself caught up in the flow and straying out of bounds with my material. To help you discover whether or not you may be flirting with the same R-rated conundrum, here are a dozen tell-tale signs that, wittingly or otherwise, you’ve acquired some expertise in writing the […]

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How to Know When You’re on the Cusp of Old Age

February 1st, 2014 · 3 Comments · American Humor, Amusing, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Charming, Cute, Family Humor, Farce, Funny Aging, Funny Family, Funny Generation Gap, Funny Rant, Heartwarming, Human Nature, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Romp, Sardonic, Screwball, Silly, Whimsy, Zany

This story doesn’t need much preamble. Besides, I like to keep my writing short these days. Maybe it’s a by-product of growing crankier. From a man’s point of view, the following are advance indicators that you may be approaching the “senior” years. (1) You read episode summaries of your favorite TV shows on the Internet […]

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Dracula Meets Al Gore

November 16th, 2013 · 1 Comment · American Humor, Amusing, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Cute, Family Humor, Farce, Funny Banter, Funny Dialogue Story, Funny Environmental, Funny Family, Funny Horror, Funny Husband and Wife Banter, General Humor, Horror, Jokes, Literary, Macabre, Monster, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Romp, Sardonic, Satire, Screwball, Silly, Uncategorized, Whimsy, Witty, Zany

The 19th century writers Mary Shelley and Bram Stoker were among the first great environmentalists. Their creations – Frankenstein’s “monster” and Count Dracula respectively ‒ blazed new trails in preserving scarce resources. In his research and during the operation that led to his triumph, Dr. Frankenstein was careful to use the purest form of electric […]

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Too Soon? Too Much? Too Bad

November 9th, 2013 · No Comments · Afterlife, American Humor, Amusing, Bad Taste, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Celebrities, Comedians, Cute, Disturbing, Entertainment, Family Humor, Farce, Funny Embarrassment, Funny Irony, General Humor, Human Nature, Jokes, Lifestyle, Macabre, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Retribution, Revenge, Romp, Sardonic, Satire, Screwball, Silly, Slice of Life, Surprise Twists, Tasteless, Twisted, Whimsy, Witty, Zany

Certain professional comedians believe they have a sacred duty to uncover something funny in every situation ‒ natural disasters and human misfortune be damned. As an individual who often writes material that is intended to be humorous, I may sympathize with this approach even while cringeing. When the average man or woman attempts such levity, […]

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If Porcupines Had Wings, No Balloon Would be Safe

October 26th, 2013 · 1 Comment · American Humor, Amusing, Anthropomorphic, Bad Taste, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Charming, Cute, Family Humor, Farce, Feel Good, Funny Animal, Funny Irony, Funny Parable, General Humor, Heartwarming, Human Nature, Irony, Jokes, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Puns, Romp, Sardonic, Satire, Screwball, Silly, Surprise Twists, Surrealism, Whimsy, Witty, Zany

In the political debates leading up to, during and following the recent government shutdown in Washington, a lot of “what ifs” were thrown around by some of the participants. This led me to consider some intriguing what-ifs that might be proposed for the animal kingdom. Here are a dozen or so. Keep in mind it’s […]

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Bad Teeth and Smelly Feet (a.k.a., Toronto’s Plastic Bag Ban)

June 16th, 2012 · 2 Comments · American Humor, Amusing, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Economic Humor, Family Humor, Farce, Funny Embarrassment, Funny Environmental, Funny Family, Funny Government, Funny Politics, Funny Rant, Funny Smell, Funny Toronto, Green Environment, Human Nature, Lifestyle, Outrageous, Political Humor, Rant, Sardonic, Satire, Screwball, Whimsy

Toronto City Council recently banned the use of plastic bags beginning January 1, 2013. It’s a tremendous source of comfort to me that our elected officials are always looking out for what’s in our best interests, whether we know it or not.   My family of five will no longer be able to tote home […]

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How to Know When You’re a Hypochondriac

April 23rd, 2012 · 1 Comment · American Humor, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Charming, Cute, Family Humor, Farce, General Humor, Human Nature, Jokes, Lifestyle, Macabre, Medical Humor, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Screwball, Slice of Life, Twisted, Whimsy, Witty, Zany

There are certain tell-tale signs that let you know if and when you’ve become a hypochondriac. The following is a brief list. There are many more indicators, but logging them would take an effort that might better go towards looking after my (I mean your) health. (1) You bought your first coffin when you were aged […]

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The Priestess and Her Strobe Light Burden

January 28th, 2012 · No Comments · Afterlife, Allegory or Fairy Tale, American Humor, British Humour, Canada Humor, Cop Humor, Disturbing, Fairy Tale, Family, Family Humor, Family Tragedy, Fantasy, Funny Horror, Funny Murder, Funny Paranormal, Ghost Story, Horror, Human Nature, Imagery, Lifestyle, Lyrical, Macabre, Magic Realism, Medieval, Monster, Murder, Mystery, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Prose Poetry, Religion, Retribution, Revenge, Sardonic, Scary, Screwball, Sorcery, Supernatural, Surprise Twists, Twisted, Witchcraft

With the exception of a section towards the end of this story, all of the events recorded below occurred in one special year. The season and the locales are noted in italics. ** Early spring, Barrie, Ontario, Canada: The first officer on the scene struggled to come up with a reaction. He thought it wasn’t […]

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Pretty Sure What Done Him In

November 26th, 2011 · 2 Comments · Academics, Allegory or Fairy Tale, American Humor, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Cop Humor, Cute, Disturbing, Fairy Tale, Family Tragedy, Fantasy, Funny Horror, Funny Murder, Funny Noir, General Humor, Horror, Human Nature, Imagery, Jokes, Lifestyle, Literary, Mood, Murder, Murder Mystery, Mystery, Noir, Not As It Seems, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Parable, Police Lifestyle, Sardonic, Satire, Scary, Screwball, Slice of Life, Supernatural, Surprise Twists, Twisted, Whimsy, Witty, Zany

“His brain was trashed,” she said. “Excuse me?” was his response. “I don’t know how it happened, but his brain was trashed. You know, like a hotel room after a rock star’s attack of indigestion,” said Corina. “Wow! Any idea how it happened?” asked Chief Inspector Beige. “I’m pretty sure I answered that question.” Corina […]

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