Alex Carrick’s Blog

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Entries Tagged as 'Sardonic'

Bad Teeth and Smelly Feet (a.k.a., Toronto’s Plastic Bag Ban)

June 16th, 2012 · 2 Comments · American Humor, Amusing, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Economic Humor, Family Humor, Farce, Funny Environmental, Funny Family, Funny Government, Funny Rant, Green Environment, Human Nature, Jokes, Lifestyle, Outrageous, Political Humor, Rant, Sardonic, Satire, Screwball, Whimsy

Toronto City Council recently banned the use of plastic bags beginning January 1, 2013. It’s a tremendous source of comfort to me that our elected officials are always looking out for what’s in our best interests, whether we know it or not.   My family of five will no longer be able to tote home [...]

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The Priestess and Her Strobe Light Burden

January 28th, 2012 · No Comments · Afterlife, Allegory or Fairy Tale, Cop Humor, Disturbing, Fairy Tale, Family, Family Humor, Family Tragedy, Fantasy, Ghost Story, Horror, Human Nature, Imagery, Lifestyle, Lyrical, Macabre, Magic Realism, Medieval, Monster, Murder, Mystery, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Prose Poetry, Religion, Retribution, Revenge, Sardonic, Scary, Screwball, Sorcery, Supernatural, Surprise Twists, Twisted, Witchcraft

With the exception of a section towards the end of this story, all of the events recorded below occurred in one special year. The season and the locales are noted in italics. ** Early spring, Barrie, Ontario, Canada: The first officer on the scene struggled to come up with a reaction. He thought it wasn’t [...]

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Foil’s Forsaken Folio

December 18th, 2011 · Comments Off · Academics, Allegory or Fairy Tale, American Humor, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Clash of the Sexes, Coming of Age, Fairy Tale, Family Humor, Family Tragedy, Fantasy, Funny Horror, Funny Murder, General Humor, General Interest, Horror, Human Nature, Irony, Jokes, Lifestyle, Literary, Macabre, Monster, Murder, Murder Mystery, Not As It Seems, Oddball, Offbeat, Parable, Romance, Sardonic, Satire, School Days, Screwball, Sexual Innuendo, Storytelling, Surprise Twists, Twisted, Whimsy, Zany

There once lived a king who loved the theater. His taste crossed all genres – romances, sophisticated comedies, broad farces and stomach-churning tragedies. He particularly liked historical pieces that featured his ancestors. Watching his predecessors parade around in crowns and tiaras while engaging in outrageous behavior was a self-centered delight. The royals’ peccadilloes were well [...]

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Pretty Sure What Done Him In

November 26th, 2011 · 1 Comment · Academics, Allegory or Fairy Tale, American Humor, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Cop Humor, Cute, Disturbing, Fairy Tale, Family Tragedy, Fantasy, Funny Horror, Funny Murder, General Humor, Horror, Human Nature, Imagery, Jokes, Lifestyle, Literary, Mood, Murder, Murder Mystery, Mystery, Not As It Seems, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Parable, Police Lifestyle, Sardonic, Satire, Scary, Screwball, Slice of Life, Supernatural, Surprise Twists, Twisted, Whimsy, Witty, Zany

“His brain was trashed,” she said. “Excuse me?” was his response. “I don’t know how it happened, but his brain was trashed. You know, like a hotel room after a rock star’s attack of indigestion,” said Corina. “Wow! Any idea how it happened?” asked Chief Inspector Beige. “I’m pretty sure I answered that question.” Corina [...]

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Physician to Precarious Longings

November 19th, 2011 · 2 Comments · American Humor, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Charming, Clash of the Sexes, Coming of Age, Crossed Wires, Cute, Difficult Decisions, Family Humor, Feel Good, Funny Family, General Humor, General Interest, Hard Life Choices, Heartwarming, Human Nature, Lifestyle, Literary, Love, Mood, Not As It Seems, Oddball, Offbeat, Parable, Prose Poetry, Romance, Sardonic, Screwball, Seduction, Sexual Innuendo, Slice of Life, Surprise Twists, Sweet, Uplifting, Whimsy, Witty

What he liked about her was her laughter. What she liked about him was his silence. Her laughter was quiet, rich and reflective. It was doled out sparingly. When forthcoming, you knew it had been earned. It carried neither price tag, nor was gained at another’s expense. Sometimes she giggled. Those were special occasions, when they [...]

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The Grief Machine

November 12th, 2011 · 3 Comments · Allegory or Fairy Tale, American Humor, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Charming, Children and Pets, Clash of the Sexes, Cop Humor, Cute, Fairy Tale, Family Humor, Fantasy, Feel Good, Funny Dog Stories, Funny Family, Funny Science Fiction, Funny Technology, Funny Workplace, General Humor, General Interest, Human Nature, Imagery, Irony, Jokes, Lifestyle, Not As It Seems, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Parable, Religious allegory, Romance, Sardonic, Satire, Science Fiction, Screwball, Seduction, Slice of Life, Surprise Twists, Twisted, Whimsy, Witty, Workplace, Zany

XaniaXYM-529’s attention was glued to one of thousands of monitors hooked up to the enormous rumbling machine that was focused on the planet a considerable distance away. He was luxuriating onboard his species’ most modern space station. From earth, the craft was hidden in the flotsam that made up Saturn’s ring. The giant device at [...]

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Bullet Proof

November 5th, 2011 · 3 Comments · American Humor, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Celebrities, Charming, General Humor, General Interest, Human Nature, Lifestyle, Oddball, Offbeat, Politicians, Sardonic, Screwball, Slice of Life, Storytelling, Surprise Twists, Twisted, U.S. Social Commentary, Whimsy, Witty, Zany

An actor, a writer, a politician and a rich dude were sitting on the back portico of the latter’s mansion. They quaffed a non-alcoholic concoction while looking out over an enormous aqua-blue swimming pool and a garden vista that stretched a quarter of a mile before being bracketed by a security-enhanced fence and towering evergreens. [...]

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The Monkey, the Croc and the T-Rex

November 1st, 2011 · 5 Comments · Allegory or Fairy Tale, American Humor, Anthropomorphic, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Charming, Cute, Economic Humor, Fairy Tale, Fantasy, Funny Parable, Funny Rant, Funny Technology, General Humor, General Interest, Jokes, Lifestyle, Not As It Seems, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Parable, Political Humor, Puns, Rant, Sardonic, Satire, Science Fiction, Screwball, Slice of Life, Storytelling, Surprise Twists, Twisted, Whimsy, Witty, Zany

“Dinosaur Spots Comet in Sky.” “That’s the headline I’m going with,” said Dilly the crocodile to Tony the T-Rex, as they faced each other across the entranceway to the latter’s luxurious cave. It was the most modern of eras in an alternative universe containing the 88th iteration of “standard” earth where the animals had evolved [...]

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Anheuser-Busch the Budgie (Suggestions to Lower Washington’s Debt)

July 21st, 2011 · 3 Comments · Advertising, American Humor, Armed Forces Lifestyle, British Humour, Canada Humor, Corruption, Cute, Difficult Decisions, Economics, Funny Rant, General Humor, General Interest, Human Nature, Irony, Jokes, Military Life, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Political Humor, Politicians, Puns, Rant, Sardonic, Satire, Scandal, Screwball, Silly, Twisted, U.S. Social Commentary, Vice, Whimsy, Witty, Zany

Washington has a huge debt problem and the Democrats, Republicans and Tea Party can’t agree on which comes first, increase taxes or lower spending. Here are some innovative answers I’ve come up with, combining both approaches and some “outside the box” ideas, to break the impasse. (1) Privatize the issuing of birth certificates to Donald [...]

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Chuck the Wagon Driver and His Reluctant Bride

June 25th, 2011 · No Comments · American Humor, British Humour, Canada Humor, Career Choices, Charming, Clash of the Sexes, Cute, Family, Family Humor, Feel Good, Funny Family, General Humor, Heartwarming, Human Nature, Imagery, Jokes, Lifestyle, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Romance, Sardonic, Screwball, Seduction, Sexual Innuendo, Silly, Slice of Life, Surprise Twists, Sweet, Wedding, Whimsy, Witty, Zany

Charley Van Dearon was an outdoorsy type who liked fishing, hunting and even scrapping when the occasion warranted. He was rugged of demeanor, with an excess of vigor to go along with a fun-loving nature. Still, he was no one-dimensional cartoon. He had a sensitive and romantic side with deeper thoughts than many of his [...]

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