Alex Carrick’s Blog

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If Porcupines Had Wings, No Balloon Would be Safe

October 26th, 2013 · 1 Comment · American Humor, Amusing, Anthropomorphic, Bad Taste, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Charming, Cute, Family Humor, Farce, Feel Good, Funny Animal, Funny Irony, Funny Parable, General Humor, Heartwarming, Human Nature, Irony, Jokes, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Puns, Romp, Sardonic, Satire, Screwball, Silly, Surprise Twists, Surrealism, Whimsy, Witty, Zany

In the political debates leading up to, during and following the recent government shutdown in Washington, a lot of “what ifs” were thrown around by some of the participants. This led me to consider some intriguing what-ifs that might be proposed for the animal kingdom. Here are a dozen or so. Keep in mind it’s […]

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A Dozen Answers to One Osama Bin Laden Mystery

May 7th, 2011 · 3 Comments · American Humor, Armed Forces Lifestyle, Bad Taste, Canada Humor, Celebrities, Family, Funny Horror, General Humor, General Interest, Hard Life Choices, Human Nature, Jokes, Lifestyle, Monster, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Political Humor, Sardonic, Screwball, Slice of Life, Surprise Twists, Tasteless, Twisted, U.S. Social Commentary, Whimsy, Witty

The following attempts to provide an answer to one major mystery attached to the most recent behavior of Osama Bin Laden. By the way, I realize some people may wonder about the “taste” of this piece. That’s why I’m issuing a “gallows humor” alert up-front.  So why did Osama choose to keep his family living in plain sight […]

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That Would Be Naïve of Me

April 24th, 2010 · 6 Comments · American Humor, Canada Humor, Cop Humor, Corruption, Difficult Decisions, Disturbing, Economic Humor, Economics, Family, Funny Rant, Funny Workplace, General Humor, General Interest, Hard Life Choices, Human Nature, Jokes, Lifestyle, Mathematics, Mystery, Not As It Seems, Oddball, Offbeat, Police Lifestyle, Political Humor, Politicians, Rant, Sardonic, Satire, Scandal, Slice of Life, Surprise Twists, Technology Advances, Twisted, U.S. Social Commentary, Vice, Workplace, Zany

As a special favor, Louise Traynor was escorted to a couple’s table in the trattoria’s alcove by the establishment’s executive chef and owner late into the luncheon sitting. The faux Italian décor was complemented by Dean Martin crooning in the background. A tiny fountain listlessly gurgled in the centre of the room. Other diners noted […]

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A Curious Case of Bottled-up Passion

January 23rd, 2010 · 3 Comments · Allegory or Fairy Tale, American Humor, Art History, Canada Humor, Career Choices, Charming, Children and Pets, Clash of the Sexes, Cop Humor, Cute, Difficult Decisions, Drama, Fairy Tale, Family Humor, Family Tragedy, Fantasy, Feel Good, General Humor, General Interest, Hard Life Choices, Heartwarming, History, Human Nature, Jokes, Lifestyle, Mystery, Not As It Seems, Oddball, Offbeat, Police Lifestyle, Romance, Satire, Science Fiction, Screwball, Sexual Innuendo, Slice of Life, Surprise Twists, Technology Advances, Twisted, U.S. Social Commentary, Uplifting, Whimsy, Witty, Zany

Pug-nosed Pat and gum-chewing Chris, two long-time Irish cops, were back on the day shift after a month spent on the night rotation. Their patrol area ranged from the entertainment district in the east to the upscale shopping blocks downtown. Being a cop in these days was quite a different experience than it had been […]

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Spartacus the Kite

August 23rd, 2009 · 2 Comments · Allegory or Fairy Tale, American Humor, Anthropomorphic, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Career Choices, Charming, Children and Pets, Cottage Life, Cute, Difficult Decisions, Dreams, Family Humor, Family Tragedy, Fantasy, General Humor, General Interest, Hard Life Choices, Heartwarming, Jokes, Lifestyle, Lyrical, Offbeat, Parable, Romp, Screwball, Sports and Recreation, Whimsy, Wishful Thinking, Witty, Zany

I made it. I’m free. I can’t believe it. This is so great!   I can hear them talking below me. They think this is a tragedy and it’s making them sad. They suspect the tree was lurking to ensnare me. They couldn’t be more wrong. I saw my opportunity and I took it.   The […]

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Every Family Lives by Its Sayings

August 12th, 2009 · Comments Off on Every Family Lives by Its Sayings · American Humor, British Humour, Canada Humor, Charming, Children and Pets, Coming of Age, Cute, Family, Family Humor, Feel Good, Funny Family, Funny Parable, Funny Sayings, General Humor, General Interest, Heartwarming, Human Nature, Jokes, Lifestyle, Nostalgia, Oddball, Offbeat, Puns, Screwball, Slice of Life, Sweet, Uplifting, Whimsy, Witty, Zany

“When one scoop of ice cream is too much, two scoops can sometimes be just right.” That was something my wife, Donna, said one summer evening – perhaps unwittingly, we’ve never been quite sure – when the family walked to the local ice cream parlour for a cool treat. Then she demonstrated her belief in this […]

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Celebrity Greeters at Wal-Mart Continued

April 15th, 2009 · 1 Comment · American Humor, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Celebrities, Cute, Family Humor, Famous Actors, Farce, Funny Banter, Funny Celebrity, Funny Sayings, Funny Shopping, Funny Workplace, General Humor, Human Nature, Jokes, Lifestyle, Offbeat, Puns, Romp, Screwball, Silly, Whimsy, Witty, Workplace, Zany

In an earlier blog entry, I introduced the possibility of celebrities, when their careers end or hit a dry spell, finding employment as “greeters” at Wal-Mart. Some of them would have rather obvious opening lines when you walk through the doors to go shopping.

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Canadian Male Pick-up Lines

February 7th, 2009 · 2 Comments · American Humor, Armed Forces Lifestyle, Bad Taste, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Clash of the Sexes, Coming of Age, Cute, Family Humor, Funny Sex, General Humor, General Interest, Human Nature, Jokes, Lifestyle, Oddball, Offbeat, Outrageous, Puns, Romance, Satire, Screwball, Seduction, Sexual Innuendo, Slice of Life, Sports and Recreation, Tasteless, Twisted, Witty, Zany

In the quest for mates, various species of Canadian males have their own unique and surprisingly successful “pick-up” or “come-on” lines they use in drinking establishments, shopping mall food courts and wherever else potential female companionship is to be found.   Here are a few of them. I know these are effective, because I’ve tried several […]

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Marriage and Multi-tasking

January 19th, 2009 · 1 Comment · American Humor, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Charming, Children and Pets, Cottage Life, Cute, Entertainment, Family, Family Humor, Feel Good, Funny Family, Funny Workplace, Heartwarming, Human Nature, Jokes, Lifestyle, Nostalgia, Not As It Seems, Oddball, Offbeat, Screwball, Seduction, Slice of Life, Sports and Recreation, Surprise Twists, Twisted, Uplifting, Wedding, Whimsy

My wife and I had kind of a unique wedding. We sort of eloped, but then we also bought the farm on the same day –  literally, not figuratively. And our only child at the time, Tom, aged 12, was my best man.   Donna and I were due to get married, so we arranged for […]

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My Wife and I Argue over a Plant

July 28th, 2008 · 8 Comments · American Humor, British Comedy, British Humour, Canada Humor, Charming, Clash of the Sexes, Cute, Family, Family Humor, Feel Good, Funny Dialogue Story, Funny Family, Funny Husband & Wife Story, Funny Husband and Wife Banter, Funny Rant, Funny Workplace, General Humor, General Interest, Heartwarming, Human Nature, Jokes, Lifestyle, Oddball, Offbeat, Plants, Rant, Sardonic, Screwball, Slice of Life, Surprise Twists, Twisted, Whimsy, Witty

My wife and I argued over a plant tonight and it isn’t even our plant. During our usual de-briefing after a busy day, she told me the following story about her workplace that I think will resonate with many readers. I am changing most of the names to protect the innocent and this is, truly, […]

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