Alex Carrick’s Blog

“Real” men know how to make and repair things. They’re even able to improvise. I’m always astonished when one of my friends assembles furniture out of ferns. I’m not feeling as bad about my shortcomings as I used to. Nowadays, most things are so complex that when they break down, the only recourse is to […]

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Surrounded by racy stories in the media everywhere these days, I sometimes find myself caught up in the flow and straying out of bounds with my material. To help you discover whether or not you may be flirting with the same R-rated conundrum, here are a dozen tell-tale signs that, wittingly or otherwise, you’ve acquired some expertise in writing the […]

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This story doesn’t need much preamble. Besides, I like to keep my writing short these days. Maybe it’s a by-product of growing crankier. From a man’s point of view, the following are advance indicators that you may be approaching the “senior” years. (1) You read episode summaries of your favorite TV shows on the Internet […]

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The 19th century writers Mary Shelley and Bram Stoker were among the first great environmentalists. Their creations – Frankenstein’s “monster” and Count Dracula respectively ‒ blazed new trails in preserving scarce resources. In his research and during the operation that led to his triumph, Dr. Frankenstein was careful to use the purest form of electric […]

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Certain professional comedians believe they have a sacred duty to uncover something funny in every situation ‒ natural disasters and human misfortune be damned. As an individual who often writes material that is intended to be humorous, I may sympathize with this approach even while cringeing. When the average man or woman attempts such levity, […]

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In the political debates leading up to, during and following the recent government shutdown in Washington, a lot of “what ifs” were thrown around by some of the participants. This led me to consider some intriguing what-ifs that might be proposed for the animal kingdom. Here are a dozen or so. Keep in mind it’s […]

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Toronto City Council recently banned the use of plastic bags beginning January 1, 2013. It’s a tremendous source of comfort to me that our elected officials are always looking out for what’s in our best interests, whether we know it or not.   My family of five will no longer be able to tote home […]

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There are certain tell-tale signs that let you know if and when you’ve become a hypochondriac. The following is a brief list. There are many more indicators, but logging them would take an effort that might better go towards looking after my (I mean your) health. (1) You bought your first coffin when you were aged […]

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With the exception of a section towards the end of this story, all of the events recorded below occurred in one special year. The season and the locales are noted in italics. ** Early spring, Barrie, Ontario, Canada: The first officer on the scene struggled to come up with a reaction. He thought it wasn’t […]

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“His brain was trashed,” she said. “Excuse me?” was his response. “I don’t know how it happened, but his brain was trashed. You know, like a hotel room after a rock star’s attack of indigestion,” said Corina. “Wow! Any idea how it happened?” asked Chief Inspector Beige. “I’m pretty sure I answered that question.” Corina […]

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